Adapted from her TEDx talk of the same name, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's essay "We Should All Be Feminists" offers readers a unique definition of feminism for the twenty-first century, one rooted in inclusion and awareness.
Author:
Ngozi Adichie Chima
Published Year:
2014-10-09
First, let's look at the core definition of feminism.
Adichie's friend, Okoloma, first called her a feminist when she was just fourteen. It wasn't a compliment. His tone suggested she was a "supporter of terrorism." Now, this is crucial, because it highlights a common misconception.
Many people associate feminism with man-hating or radicalism. But Adichie offers a simple, powerful definition: A feminist is anyone, male or female, who believes there's a problem with gender as it is today and that we must fix it.
It's about acknowledging the systemic inequalities and working towards a solution. Think about it. Have you ever witnessed a situation where someone was treated unfairly because of their gender? Maybe a woman was overlooked for a promotion, or a man was mocked for showing emotion. These aren't isolated incidents; they're symptoms of a deeper problem. "We Should All Be Feminists" calls for this recognition.
Adichie shares a story about a time she was teaching a writing class.
Adichie shares a story about a time she was teaching a writing class. She was worried about being taken seriously, so she wore a "very serious, very manly, and very ugly suit." She didn't want to appear "too feminine."
This is a perfect example of how deeply ingrained gender expectations are. We often feel pressured to conform to certain norms, even if it means suppressing our true selves. But Adichie realized that by trying to fit in, she was actually hindering her ability to connect with her students. She wasn't being her authentic self. "We Should All Be Feminists" encourages breaking free from these expectations.
So, here's how we can start to challenge these internal biases. Try this: The next time you're getting ready for an important event, pay attention to your inner dialogue. Are you making choices based on what you *think* you should wear, or what you *want* to wear? Are you censoring yourself to fit someone else's idea of what's appropriate? Now, this is not just about clothes. It is about every area of our life.
Now, let's pause here, and talk about the resistance to the word "feminist."
Some people ask, "Why not just say you're a believer in human rights?" Adichie argues that this is dishonest. Using the vague term "human rights" ignores the specific problem of gender inequality.
It's like saying "all lives matter" in response to "Black lives matter." It diminishes the unique struggles faced by a particular group. For centuries, women have been excluded and oppressed. The solution needs to acknowledge that. It's not about being "just human"; it's about being a *female* human in a world that often treats women as less than. "We Should All Be Feminists" emphasizes the importance of acknowledging this.
Adichie points out that some men feel threatened by feminism. This often stems from the way boys are raised. They're taught that their self-worth is tied to being in charge. So, the idea of equality can feel like a loss of power.
But, here's why this matters: True equality benefits everyone. It frees men from the pressure to conform to rigid masculine stereotypes. It allows them to be more emotionally expressive and vulnerable. It creates a more balanced and compassionate society. "We Should All Be Feminists" highlights the benefits for all.
Adichie recalls a time when she and a male friend, Louis, were leaving a Lagos hotel.
Adichie recalls a time when she and a male friend, Louis, were leaving a Lagos hotel. The parking attendant thanked Louis for a tip, even though Adichie had given it. Louis hadn't even noticed.
The attendant assumed that the money *must* have come from the man. This seemingly small incident reveals a much larger issue: the assumption that men are the primary earners and decision-makers.
This not only undermines women's contributions but also reinforces the idea that women are dependent on men. These subtle, everyday biases shape our perceptions and perpetuate inequality. "We Should All Be Feminists" uses this anecdote to illustrate a broader point.
Many men don't *have* to think about gender because the system is designed to benefit them. It's a privilege to be able to ignore the inequalities that others face every day.
Let's move on to how gender roles limit children.
Adichie talks about how we raise girls to be "likeable" and boys to be "strong." We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller. We tell them they can have ambition, but not too much. We praise them for being quiet and obedient.
On the other hand, we teach boys to suppress their emotions, to be tough and unemotional. We tell them that vulnerability is weakness. These rigid expectations harm both genders.
They create a culture where girls are afraid to speak up and boys are afraid to feel. Imagine a world where children are encouraged to be their full, authentic selves, regardless of gender. Where girls are encouraged to be leaders and boys are encouraged to be empathetic. That's the world feminism envisions. "We Should All Be Feminists" advocates for this change.
Here's a practical application: Think about the language you use. Do you use phrases like "man up" or "don't be a girl"? These seemingly harmless expressions reinforce harmful stereotypes. Try to be more mindful of the words you choose and how they might perpetuate gender biases.
Adichie's great-grandmother, from the stories she's heard, was a feminist, even though she didn't know the word.
Adichie's great-grandmother, from the stories she's heard, was a feminist, even though she didn't know the word. She ran away from an unwanted marriage and married the man she chose. She protested when she was denied land because she was female.
She didn't have a label for it, but she embodied the spirit of feminism: the refusal to accept injustice. Adichie says the best feminist she knows is her brother, Kene. He's kind, good-looking, and masculine.
This challenges the stereotype of feminists as angry, man-hating women. It shows that feminism is about equality, not about hating men. "We Should All Be Feminists" provides examples to counter common stereotypes.
The author suggests a simple exercise: Pay attention to the everyday interactions you witness. Notice how often gender plays a role in how people are treated. Observe the subtle biases and assumptions that shape our behavior. The more aware we become of these patterns, the better equipped we are to challenge them. "We Should All Be Feminists" encourages constant awareness.
Culture does not make people. People make culture.
The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are.
Masculinity is a hard, small cage, and we put boys inside this cage.
We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller.
We say to girls, 'You can have ambition, but not too much.'
Gender as it functions today is a grave injustice.
The person more qualified to lead is not the physically stronger person. It is the more intelligent, the more knowledgeable, the more creative, the more innovative.
We spend too much time teaching girls to worry about what boys think of them. But the reverse is not the case.
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